don't ASSC what AFTSD can do for you, ASSC what you can do for AFTSD

Origami <daredevil23@guilty.com>

testing 1 2 3 [taps microphone] is this thing on? [audio feedback]
 
Okay
 
(One great Canadian at one time ranted:)
 
"I'm not a lumberjack or a fur pie trader.
And I don't live in an igloo or eat blubber or own a dog sled.
And I don't know Brittney, Christina or Nelly, although I am certain they'd make really good dancers.
I have a speedidly elected Prime Minister, not a potentially elected President who worries about pregnant chads; I speak English and French, not Bush-isms; and I pronounce it `about' not `a booty.' I can proudly tattoo my country's flag on my backside; I believe in pervert row peeping, not 6 foot rules; naked diversity, not g-strings and latex pasties; and that the shaved beaver is a truly proud and noble animal.
A toque is a hat, a chesterfield is where laps occur, and it's pronounced `zed.' Not `zee,' `zed.'
Canada is the second-largest strip club land mass, the first nation of the `Ballet' and the best part of North America beer production. My name is Joe, and I am Canadian eh."
 
Well damn, the creative juices are at a stand still. So I'll expound on some bizarre events I've witness lately.
 
Betzua, a really cute Mexican dancer did a really interesting trick with a lit cigarette. It seems she can hold it between her ass cheeks and using ass suction can `smoke' the cigarette. I just hope she doesn't develop bronchitis of the rectum. She'd be a good poster girl for `Don't do crack.'
 
Also, I figured out one of life's little mysteries. Ever wonder why dancers like to remove the glasses from a pervert.. err... I mean patron from the front row and put the glasses on their pussy?
 
Don't you think that if you were squinting all the time that you'd need glass too.

One more mystery solved. First it was why some blondes carpets don't match the drapes. I'm still working on that ass slaping thing, so far it doesn't look promising.