ASSC: ASSCon-LV3 Journal (Part 1 of 2) Las Vegas, Nv. Thursday, 01/08/98 ASSCon-LV3: The Strip NOTE: While rummaging through my archive of half-started posts, non- posted personal journal entries, and/or miscellaneous ASSC-related files on my hard disk, I came across this partially-written journal entry about my experiences during ASSCon-LV3 from earlier this year. Beings how I've been in a slightly nostalgic mood lately (OH NO, say it ain't so!), I decided to clean it up a bit and post it now, albeit VERY late. Sorry, LMR, for the delay... ;-). This post is dedicated to LMR, JimForte and everyone else involved for organizing and helping to make ASSCon-LV3 such a huge success. * * * * * ASSCers and friends: Princess DEVON, Danny, CP-One, CP SYDNEY, NC MORA, JADE-BLUE ECLIPSE, The Panty Guy, Dirty Dick, Sullivan Titwillow, Dr. Mazoola, TIFFANY, TEENA, Marc182, LMR, MsGINGER, DARA LYNNE DAHL, CARA ST. JAMES, Dyn0, SERENA. PROLOGUE: Decided early on last year to attend the 1998 Winter Consumer Electronics Show (CES) and planned ASSCon-LV3 in Las Vegas... hell, it'd be fun to get reacquainted with the porno biz again! And besides, Cuzzin ALS and Brother EDIE had all but convinced me to go with their giddy anticipation of meeting porn stars (ESPECIALLY God Rocco and Taylor Wane). And if I didn't already have enough of a reason to look forward to it, slim Gummi-eatin' redhead, Mastah of Ass, Mistress of All-Who-Sniff-Bwutt, IRC CAPS-LOCK GIRL AND Chez Paree dancer, Princess DEVON, excited by all the LV talk by dancers and ASSCers at CP, asked me in October if she could join me as my LV traveling companion... "Make sure we get a room with one of those 25-cent vibrating beds", her only request. Sure... NO problem :-). However, after months of giddy anticipation and ultra-high expections for CES and ASSCon-LV3 (on IRC, at CP, etc.), the few weeks leading up to the trip were, for me, marred by personal setbacks, work- related stress and, of course, the holiday blues. So I hoped that this Las Vegas trip would be stress-free, a vacation to relax and take it easy. * * * * * Thursday, 01/08/98 Arrived in SF at 940am to pick DEVON up early enough for breakfast and 1150am flight out of Oakland. She's running a little late (having JUST stepped out of the shower), so she suggests, as a way of saving some time, meeting her at Coffee Rons (aka Red's Corner) for breakfast. Sounds good to me. While sitting at the just-painted-dark- brown-and-still-WET bar waiting for her, I wind up chit-chatting with the graveyard shift bartender (didn't catch his name), day shift bartender (and CP manager) Danny, and later Red's (and CP) owner CP-One, who can't resist saying, "Hey Bubs, you're here pretty early today!" ;-). Hell, even CP SYDNEY passed thru the bar at some point... WTF, it's 10am?! DEVON arrives awhile later (1020am) and we order breakfast. She: bacon (with lotsa fat please!) and eggs. Me: pancakes. Not sure why but the pancakes took a little while to prepare. No problem though, we certainly have enough time to make our flight. While eating breakfast, we spent a considerable amount of care trying (but not quite succeeding) to avoid getting the bar's new paint on our sleeves, pants, hands, face, etc. As she finished eating, DEVON suddenly realizes she forgot to pack a few things, so she suggests running back to her place to get them and asks me to meet her there after I finish eating my late-arriving pancakes... uh, ok. By now, it's 1105am... still enough time to make it (hell, Oakland's only minutes away, or so I think). After a brief wait at her place (1115am) we finally get ourselves together and head for Oakland. Hmmm, these lights on 5th St. take awhile to change... 1125am and we're finally on the Bay Bridge... "Uhm, DEVON, I think we're gonna be cuttin' it pretty close... so when we get to the airport, I'll drop you off at the express baggage check-in while I part the car". 1130am and we're on the main road to the airport. This is gonna be REAL close. 1135am as I drop DEVON and our luggage off at the Southwest curb and she awaits curbside check-in. 1140am as I find a long-term parking spot. 1145am as I jog with my backpack and briefcase to Terminal 2, only to find that our gate is actually in Terminal 1(!) so now I'm sprinting like a madman... God I hope our flight is delayed! Fortuitously, I catch up to DEVON on her way to the gate. We're depart Gate 17... so let's see, we're at Gate 24, Gate 23, Gate 22... wait... now we're at Gate 1?! WTF??? Gate 2, Gate 3... huffing and puffing... I've stopped looking at my watch for fear of what it shows time-wise. We arrive at Gate 17 to find the area deserted, the door closed... 1154pm. FOUR MINUTES LATE! And damn, wouldn't you know the flight left EXACTLY on time. We missed our flight... First thought: Damn pancakes! ;-) Anyways, the attendant at the gate says that boarding the next direct flight to LV (at 245pm) won't be a problem, so we wander back to the gift shop area to sit and chill a bit. I'm sweating profusely. DEVON turns to me and says with a smile, "Oh well, what kind of adventure would this be without Bubba and DEVON missing a flight?" Yeah, damn right ;-). Turns out that Vegas has been cold recently and DEVON forgot to pack a heavy jacket, and we have enough time to make it back to SF and retrieve it... so it's back onto I-880 and Chez DEVON once again. After picking up her jacket, we return to the airport at 220pm and pick up our boarding passes (whew!). DEVON then says how she could really use a cigarette so she leaves to try and find a designated smoking area. Meanwhile, I wait in the boarding area. It's 235pm and "children and those needing assistance" are allowed to board. No sign of DEVON but hey, we still have lots of time. "Those passengers holding boarding passes 1-30 are now allowed to board". Oh well, we have cards 33-34 so... Let's see, wait, is that her? Nope. "Passengers holding cards 1-60 are now allowed to board". I begin pacing. Hmmm... where could she be? Wonder if she knows what time it is? "All passengers are now allowed to board at this time". Pacing real quick now. 242pm and the boarding area is now empty, except for the podium ladies sorting out boarding passes. Beginning to get a little concerned. Uh, can I have someone paged please? Just then, one of the ladies points and says, "Is that her coming?" Princess!!! Woah, we almost missed our second flight ;-). In fact, we're the second to last people to board the plane, and we take two vacant seats in the emergency exit row in the front of the cabin, facing the rest of the passengers. As I stuff my briefcase into one of the overhead compartments that still had room, I hear a female voice yell out, "Hey... Bubba?" I look around as I snap the overhead shut and see a woman with a window seat waving at me... it's none other than former-New Century dancer MORA!!! (whom I haven't seen since '95). I return a hello wave but the plane is just about to depart so we use hand gestures to say "let's talk in Las Vegas". Quiet flight, Princess leafing thru her artwork (some with nude figures), the mother and son sitting across from us tried not to notice ;-). * * * * * Our flight arrives at McCarran Airport (LV) at 350pm, and as we deplane, I chat with MORA a bit before heading out toward baggage claim. I'd forgotten that MORA was a "regular" at the annual CES adult video convention. In any case it was so nice to see her again! As DEVON and I wait in the large baggage claim area at McCarran, I notice JADE-BLUE ECLIPSE, in her distinctive spikey blue hair, walk by. I call out her name and we exchange a quick greet/meet. Turns out she came in on the same flight as us, and she'll be representing a "leather booth" at CES! Cool. We collect our luggage (damn, I gotta get me a bag with wheels like DEVON's!) and next stop, Alamo Rent-A-Car. No counter in the airport (uh oh...) so we catch the Alamo shuttle at the curb. After arriving at the Alamo station, I wait in a ridiculously slow moving line AND then at the counter (the first car they assign me, my agent refuses to rent to me because he admits the car is "unacceptable" based on past customers' comments - I mean, if it's unacceptable, why even continue to rent it out?), but afterwards we do have a car: a white Chevy Cavalier. Needless to say, after this experience, I will never patronize Alamo again! ...and FINALLY, it's off to the Strip! The LV Strip that is :-). Arrive at the MGM Grand and after driving completely around the building, we use the valet parking service... something we would do the rest of our stay there. Valet parking, like, rules. We wander in wide-eyed at the site of the immense, brightly colorful MGM Grand main lobby. We immediately encounter a man making balloon animals when we enter and I see a gleam in Princess's eyes. "Can you make a monkey?" Without saying a word, the man whips out a balloon. Blowwww, twist-twist-twist, black pen to sketch a face. "Hi Chim Chim!" a happy Princess exclaims as we walk towards the registration desk. 630pm and we finally check into our room: Emerald Tower, 24th floor. Woah, what a view! We relax in the room for a bit... nice to finally be here. No more than 10 minutes later, the phone rings. It's LV- friend Andy (who I met at last year's CES, a mutual friend of porn star Brooke Waters) calling to ask about my CES plans. No plans yet, maybe let's get together tomorrow. I lay back down and mention maybe having steak for dinner tonight... how 'bout Ruth's Chris Steakhouse? Princess says sure. So I make a dinner reservation for 9pm at the RC on Paradise. Shortly after another phone call... it's my longtime porno-perv friend The Panty Guy (TPG)! Seems he just returned to his room after a long day of CESing and was checking in to see if we had arrived yet, and if so, did we had dinner plans? I mention our reservation at RC and invite him and he accepts. I leave a message for Sullivan Titwillow at the Luxor and a page for LMR. At 815 Sully returns my call and invites us to his room after we finish our dinner. Cool. DEVON and I pick up TPG at his motel at 845pm and head on over to RC. A little bit of a wait so we wait in the bar until our table is ready. Short wait (not anything like our two hour wait at the other RC on Flamingo 2 yrs ago!). Princess orders king crab legs and filet mignon ("surf and turf"), TPG the ribeye, and I have the large filet. OHMYGAWD yummy! Princess practically inhales her food... yeah, I think she liked it ;-). We finish dinner and head for the Luxor. As we wander about the Luxor lobby, looking for either: 1) a phone or 2) someone who knows where a phone is... we run into TPG's and my perv friend Dirty Dick wandering around in the lobby!!! Turned out he was staying cheaply at the Luxor thru a security guard friend who works at the Luxor. DD offers to take us up (past security) to the 27th floor for a panoramic view of the hotel. And what a view it is. Sully and "friends" are on the 20th floor so after taking a combination of the "wrong" inclinator and the fire escape stairwell, we finally arrive on his floor, and, voila(!) room. Princess volunteers to knock on the door, and we are greeted by Sully who invites us in. We four (DEVON, TPG, DD and I) walk in and are met by Dr. Mazoola, TIFFANY, TEENA, Marc182, LMR and MsGINGER. Turns out DARA LYNNE had just left to go downstairs to find drinks and ice. So DEVON decides to run downstairs to try and find her... uhhhh, ok ;-). A little while later, DARA LYNNE, WITH drinks, returns, WITHOUT DEVON! Oh well, we all agree that she'll eventually find her way back. In the meantime, after putting away the drinks, DL volunteers to strap my dog collar around my neck. And soon enough, DEVON returns to the room (and given the complicated nature of the Luxor's inclinator/floor design, THAT was no easy feat ;-)), and she soon winds up in the bathtub with DARA and MsGINGER... and woah were they ever smokin'! ;-). Moments later, LMR, Sully, Maz, and TPG join them in the tub... for a group photo that is. CARA ST. JAMES, after a few "stops" along the way ;-), finally arrives at the Luxor... JUST in time to leave with us to go for breakfast/dessert. It's 115am so we just go downstairs to the all night cafe. OGM takes my leash and as we walk, we discuss "life, inner-strength, happiness", etc. As we're seated around the table it's DEVON (across from me), TPG, Maz, DL, LMR, CARA, Sully, MsGINGER, and me, chained by the leash to the table. Everyone else is starving and are gonna order dinner, but TPG, DEVON and I order desserts only. DEVON and I share a chocolate mud pie-type thing and a banana split. And DEVON also orders a vanilla shake. DEVON says, "Oh man Bubba, you're gonna gain A LOT of weight on this trip!" ;-). I help OGM decide what she wants to order... the "Burgers of Hathor"? What's Hathor, I ask. Not surprisingly, OGM knows ;-). As she explains it to me, OGM catches the waiter not offering her a choice of salad or soup, and "grills" him into making sure he wasn't trying to short-change her. In addition, OGM finds out that none of our waiters know what "Hathor" is... what kind of joint IS this anyway??? Afterward, OGM and I continue our discussion about the geometrics of life, or something. We all agree to meet at the Private Dancer booth at 2pm tomorrow for lunch. Towards the end, Dyn0 and his BYOD SERENA arrive and sit at our end of the table. But by 215am, we're done eating dessert, and TPG needs to get back to his motel (has to get up early to pick up his SF friend Steve at the airport) so we three depart from the group and take TPG back to his motel. After we return to the MGM, DEVON and I decide to do a late-night sight-see check out the Oz Buffet and while we peer thru its closed gate, make a mental note to try and eat there sometime during our stay. Then we encounter an overpass (over The Strip) leading directly to New York, New York, so we decide to take a walk. We enter NY, NY and gaze at the amazing detail of the casino's NY-motif. We then stroll thru the NY, NY casino area, weaving our way around and through the various "boroughs". After awhile, we're both exhausted, so we return to the room at 415am or so. Lights out. -Bubba